What is Bullying?
bulling> is the activity (noun)
to bully> is the action of bullying (verb)
- Imbalance of Power: people who bully use their power to control or harm. The people being bullied may have a hard time defending themselves.
- Intention to Cause Harm: actions by accident are not bullying; the person who bullies has an objective to cause harm.
- Repetition: incidents of bullying happen to the same the person, over and over, and by the same person or group.
Types of Bullying
Bullying can take many forms. Examples:- Verbal: name-calling, teasing (saying bad things and laugh)
- Social: spreading rumors, leaving people out on purpose, breaking up friendships
- Physical: hitting, punching, shoving (pushing)
- Cyberbullying: using the Internet, mobile phones or other digital technologies to harm others
Recognizing the Warning Signs
There are many warning signs or syntoms that could indicate that someone is bullying or being bullied. But these warning signs may indicate other issues or problems, too. Learn more about it and talk to your classmates, parents and teachers.Being Bullied
He or she...- Comes home with damaged or missing clothing or other belongings
- Reports losing items such as books, electronics, clothing, or jewelry
- Has unexplained injuries
- Has frequent headaches, stomachaches, or feels sick
- Has trouble sleeping or has frequent bad dreams
- Changes his or her eating habits
- Hurts themself
- Is very hungry after school (because they can't eat his/her food)
- Runs away from home
- Loses interest in visiting or talking to friends
- Is afraid of going to school or other activities with classmates
- Loses interest in school work or begins to do poorly in school
- Looks sad, moody, angry, anxious or depressed when he/she comes home
- Talks about suicide
- Feels helpless
- Often feels like he/she is not good enough
- Suddenly has fewer friends
- Avoids certain places
- Acts differently than usual
Bullying Others
- Becomes violent with others
- Gets into physical or verbal fights with others
- Gets sent to the principal’s office or detention a lot
- Has extra money or new belongings that cannot be explained
- Is quick to blame others
- Will not accept responsibility for his/her actions
- Has friends who bully others
- Needs to win or be the best at everything
What to Do When You Are Being Bullied?
- Tell them to stop.
- Walk away. Don't let them get to you. If you ignore them, they will not get that satisfaction.
- Protect yourself. Try to be in public spaces full of people you trust
- Tell an adult you trust. Talking to someone can help you. In some cases, adults must be involved to stop the bullying.
- Find a safe place. Go where you feel secure, for example: the library, a favorite teacher’s classroom, or the office.
- Stick together. Stay with a group or people that you trust.
- Find opportunities to make new friends. Explore your interests and join school or community activities such as sports, drama, or art. Volunteer or participate in community service.
Are you a Bully?
Perhaps you feel pressured to bully others, if your friends are doing it. You can think that you will not be popular or that you yourself will be bullied, if you don't do it.Sometimes you can think that you are just joking, but your words and your actions can be hurting someone.
Did you know that teens who bully are more likely to have poor grades, drop out of school, use drugs, or commit crimes? So...
Put Yourself in Their Shoes:
- Consider how they must feel. If it seems like you are hurting, stop!
- Ask the person being bullied how they feel. Maybe they are afraid or too embarrassed to say something.
- Don't let your friends bully others. If your friends are bullying others, help them see how they are hurting others.
Make it Right:
- Apologize. It can be difficult, but later it feels good!
- Focus on doing things differently from now on. You cannot change the past, but you can change how you treat others in the future.
Get Help:
- Talk with an adult. They must have good ideas about what you can do to change your habits.
- Ask for help. Talking to a counselor or a psichologist can be helpful. Sometimes it is good to talk to someone who isn't personally involved.
Do you want to learn more?: http://www.stopbullying.gov/teens/index.html
http://www.thecoolspot.gov/pressures.asp
Turn into positive attitude!
Positive attitude affirmations to put into practice:
I will think of myself as successful!
I will have positive expectations for everything I do!
I will remind myself of past successes!
I will not keep on thinking about failures, I simply will not repeat them!
I will associate with positive people and ideas!
I will whish positive things for others!
I will insist until I get positive results!
I will let myself feel love and joy!
Building Self Acceptance through Positive Self-Talk
What is self acceptance? Self accpteptance is being able to recognize your value as a person. It is essentially your level of self-worth and feeling of comfort in your own skin regardless of your faults and weaknesses. Without self acceptance, one would not be capable of reaching their full potential in life.
What is the difference between self acceptance and self-esteem?
Self esteem is a belief or feeling about yourself. It is what you believe or feel you are capable of doing. Having high self esteem can help build self acceptance.
High Self-Esteem = Feeling good about yourself
Low Self-Esteem = Feeling wrong about yourself
Self acceptance is more of an action rather than an abstact sense of self. It is something you do – you stick up for yourself, you utizlize your stengths and take responsibily for your faults, and you practice loving yourself every day.
How can I build my self acceptance? Self acceptance is a reflection of beliefs you gained as a child and adolescent. It usually comes from messages you get about yourself. These messages can come from other people (like parents, teachers, or friends) or from yourself. The messages you send yourself is called “Self-Talk.” If you are used to hearing negative messages from other people, chances are you will send yourself negative messages too. Things like “I’m so stupid,” “I’m not good enough at this…” or “It’s my fault this happened” are examples of negative self-talk. One way to rebuild your self acceptance is to re-train yourself to engage in positive self-talk. Positive self-talk us when you focus on your strengths and positive qualities, reminding yourself that you are a good and valuable person.
“I am a good and caring person and deserve to be treated with respect.”
“I am capable of achieving success in my life.”
“There are people who love me and will be there for me when I need them.”
“I deserve to be happy.”
“I am allowed to make mistakes and learn from them.”
Finish the sentences below:
I am a brave person. An example of a time I was brave is
_________________________________________________________________________
I am capable of being happy. A time I was happy was
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I am a good friend. A time I was there for a friend was
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I am capable of making decisions for myself. A time I made a good decision was
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I am loved and cared about. People who care about me are
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I am talented. Two things I am really good at are
____________________________________________________________________
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